Fire! Fire!

With such a name, I think it only fair she be a red-head, no?

Photo credit: Štefan Štefančík on Unsplash

While I don't normally pay much attention to Facebook posts requiring me to do completely pointless mental gymnastics, somehow the following post bypassed my usual defenses and enticed me into working it out in my head:

As my mother is called Phyllis, and as she designated me Jennifer - I realized that if I had a daughter and named her according to this little game, her name would be "Phyer" (pronounced "Fire", obviously). Of course, I would need to spell her name "Fyer", which is SO much cooler than the "Ph" spelling. 

Time would pass and this daughter of mine, Fyer, would grow up to be a teenager. She would have friends, as teenage girls do. And perhaps, one evening, they might go out to see a movie. If she's my daughter (and we've established that she is), she would need to use the bathroom A LOT, so she might conceivably get separated from her friends on one of her powder room pilgrimages. Returning from the restroom, upon entering the hall, she would crane her neck and search high and low for her friends. 

Her friends, already seated, would spot her looking for them. They would wave, and loudly call her over: "FYER! FYER!"... 

... And everyone around them would panic and stampede out of the theater. 

Then Fyer and her friends could watch the movie in their own personal empty theater. 

... But I think there might be a law against that.